Shutting-up shop – 12th May 2009

As of the 12th of May, CareerMole will be no more. Thanks for sharing the journey and working with us to build the CareerMole. All your feedback and patience has been invaluable as we’ve evolved. However, our efforts have been more than slightly derailed in these economic times, so the CareerMole will be no more in its current form.

Between now and the 12th of May please complete all your conversations and referrals.

Best of luck

It's official - we're in a recession - The King says so

So the UK is officially in a recession says Mervyn King in his speech yesterday to business leaders in Leeds. I don't think any one will disagree with the man. Still after 16 years of good times, for many this will be their first recession. If you've been unfortunate enough to have lost your job already, or are worried you may be next take a look at this list of Top 25 recession proof jobs....

What a crazy few weeks!

Wow. It's been a while since we last posted on our blog (sorry about that!), and what a crazy few weeks it's been! In the UK we've seen Northern Rock, Lloyds TSB/ HBOS and RBS nationalised, US power houses AIG, Merrill Lynch and Lehmans, huge bail out packages on both sides of the Atlantic, global interest rate cut, crashing stock markets and all round bewilderment with a little bit of panic thrown in.

If you're job is on the line, or has already gone, now is as good a time as any to think about new beginnings, may be a completely new career or the same thing in a different sector. With any change the best way to make the move is to learn from someone who has already done it. So reach out, ask your friends, and their friends, for some help. And if you don't know anyone whose been there, done that - why not try contacting Mole and see if they can help.

Job Alert: Cancer Research UK - Corporate Business Development Group Team Manager

We are very excited to be working with Cancer Research UK - the world’s leading charity dedicated to cancer research - to help them attract ad recruit talent.

Cancer Research are a unique charity, spending in excess of £320m a year on funding research into the causes, treatment and prevention of cancer.

They have a new position available for a Group Team Manager in the Corporate Supporter Development team. You will be responsible for the management and development of the account teams and their portfolios to deliver and develop income and added value through long-term sustainable partnerships. Your role will also involve you in contributing towards the strategic development of corporate partnerships as a whole. As well as working on partnership delivery, development and retention strategy, including engagement of the wider organisation, you will also be focused on the management and development of either team managers and/or account managers, towards the delivery of agreed objectives.

The Person

In addition to significant corporate partnership experience in an account management and new business development role, ideally with other charity and/or external/corporate experience, you will demonstrate a proven track record in people and performance management. You will also come with comprehensive knowledge of the corporate fundraising portfolio (such as: employee fundraising, cause related marketing, affinity marketing, sponsorship). Possessing excellent interpersonal skills, you will have a real ability to convey complex ideas succinctly and persuasively and be skilled at coaching, training and motivating direct reports.

How to Apply

All applications should be made via www.TheCareerMole.com‘s website. Register/ Login as a candidate, search for 'Cancer Research' jobs and apply.

The online application process involves attaching your CV and introducing yourself to a Cancer Research employee via TheCareerMole.com.

Closing date: 12th September 2008

Has your career hit a glass ceilling?

There was a lot in the news yesterday about the number of Women (or lack of) in top jobs in the UK. The fifth annual Sex and Power report shows a drop in the number of women attaining the top jobs in Britain. They hold just 11% of FTSE 100 directorships and account for only 19.3% of MPs.

We thought it would be interesting to hear from our readers, what their thoughts were about the 'Glass Ceiling' at their work. Do you feel that it is harder for women to get promoted? Are there woman at top jobs in your industry/ company? Is it getting harder rather than easier?

It would be great to hear from the future leaders of industry i.e. you guys. Is the glass ceiling just at senior levels or do women find it harder to get promoted at all levels?

Let us know via mail to the.mole@thecareermole.com or submitting a comment below.

To read the full article on 'Glass Ceilings' go to this Guardian Article

The Online Recruiter: ‘TheCareerMole.com’ made it out of the Dragon’s Den, just!

The Online Recruiter: ‘TheCareerMole.com’ made it out of the Dragon’s Den, just!

Users send in support...very amusing

Here are a couple of cuttings that we have been sent by our users that we thought you might find amusing...

Dragons' Den

For those in the UK, TheCareerMole.com will be featuring on Dragons' Den on BBC 2 today (Monday 1st Sept, 9pm).

We haven't been on TV before so we are excited and petrified all at the same time. The whole experience was superb. Incredibly well organized, the day was run with military efficiency and before you had chance to absorb what was going on, you were at the foot of the stairs waiting for your turn to go in front of the Dragons…To find out what happened you’ll have to watch Dragons’ Den on 1st September, 9pm on BBC 2.

Let us know what you think about the show - Send your comments to the.mole@thecareermole.com.

Ollie

Is it possible to get a job in 7 days? Day 3 to 5 – “Project Easy Money”

Last time, in the challenge to get a job in a week, we heard that Jim had put together his CV overnight and that I was hoping he had made a horrendous mistake in his CV in his rush to get it done. Only so that I wouldn’t lose the bet you understand.

It was already day 3. That meant, according the schedule scribbled down in the pub a few days before, he should have been attending interviews today. This gave me hope. I had no doubt, that following his show of lack of will power over the weekend, he would be putting in some hard fought time watching the Lord of the Rings trilogy. “You have new mail”…….it was from Jim.

“I thought I owed it to you to have an update;

With my first two interviews in years falling on the same day I knew that today was going to be tough! Yes that’s right, two interviews. The first interview, at 10, was with a small aid agency and the second, at 3, with a better known, larger cancer charity.

As you know, my ability to either lie or step up my game to anything approaching professionalism is arguable. Consequently, any interview that isn't a general chit chat about love, life and the world is bound to scupper me. Roll on 10 a.m., and thankfully they ask a lot of common sense questions (who knew I had common sense?) about what I'd do in this or that given situation. The two people I interviewed with were only a little older than me and so it was pretty easy to get on with them. One hour later, and having confirmed that the job was in zone 1 and paid a decent wage, I left feeling pretty good.

Owing to my confidence with interview 1, and having been able to refine my interview technique, I was able to trot out pretty much the same stuff but in a more condensed manner in interview 2. Fortunately there were 3 people interviewing me so I could say a lot of things and make out like I was still answering the same question. Another good interview – but option 1 seemed to be the one for me.”

He claimed that he would crack on with some more applications, but I wasn’t so sure. I had seen this cocky tone before. This was only confirmed when he called later on to apologies for the likelihood of him taking our money. He did however admit that I was still in the running, though he claims he was Red Rum and I was a three legged arthritic pony. Still – I was sure that was just him being cocky.

Apparently not!

End of Day 4 and the first job offer was in. From the very first interview! Perhaps he was lying? Perhaps I was stuck in a horrible dream. He showed me the offer letter. I put on a brave face; “You still have to get hold of the contract, review it and get it signed and back to them. The system and process will mean you won’t be able to work on Monday”. Jim replied, “Not if turn up at the office, request they print it off and sign it there and then. If you want things to happen, you need to go and get it done”. I think I hated him. He was just sitting there grinning. It was inevitable. I could see in his eyes that he was going to wrap this one up. Not even taking up the required time. I was going to have to pay him - He didn't even need 5 days to get the job.

He sat back, had a drink of chocolate milk and said. “I wonder if I can get a pay rise”.

Do video CVs really work?

So i've been reading a lot about video CVs being the next big thing. I'm not sure this is true. Or certainly, i don't think it will be true for the English audiences for a very long time to come.

Maybe it's down to the Great British personality but being natural and comfortable talking to camera is a strange and difficult experience for most. Start talking about your strengths and all the good interview speak normally saved for 1-2-1 sessions with the interviewer and things will probably get harder. Talking to an interviewer in the flesh is more natural and candidates will be able to get themselves across better.

So, will a video CV help you get an interview? No - not least because most recruiters are not ready to receive and view video CVs. A classic example of it not working is here.

Will the Great British public be producing their own video CVs? You tell me.
Do you have a video CV?
What has the reaction been?
Has it helped you get an interview / job offer?

Part 2 - Top 10 Job Hunting Mistakes to Avoid

Last time, in our series on the Top 10 Job Hunting Mistakes to Avoid we discussed the importance of understanding the personality of the interviewer and making sure you respond during the interview using the appropriate language, familiarity and personality.

The second Job hunting mistake we should all avoid making is No.2. Not Keeping track of your accomplishments. I bet most of you will have had to work late trying to write your annual performance review. Scratching your head trying to think of what you did in Q2 last year is always difficult. Similar, if you've just been approached about a very interesting career opportunity and need to quickly turn your CV around you can save yourself valuable time simply by having a reminder of what you've worked on over the last year.

There is no 'right' way to do this. The key is coming up with a system that requires very little effort on your part to record your accomplishments in a safe place.

My preference was to use Outlook and create a 'Performance Review' folder where I'd keep emails reminding me of all my achievements including stakeholder sign-off emails, positive feedback about work I'd lead, and significant documents could all be found quickly in one place.

Having an organised filing system can help job your memory too. One tip is to have a folder for each year in your Documents folder and group all your work for each project in a new folder.

Every time you start a new role, whether it be with the same company or a new one, you should try and make a note to update your CV. This may be asking a lot as we all lead busy lives, and the last thing most people want to do after researching, applying and interviewing for their new job is to re-visit their CV again! At the very least, do yourself a favour and keep your folders, files and emails organised and grouped so you can quickly refresh your memory about all those accomplishments as you need to.

What's next in the Top 10 series?

1. Not understanding the character of your interviewer
2. Not keeping track of your accomplishments
3. Leaving on a bad note
4. Not networking
5. Only using the Internet for research
6. Writing a generic cover letter
7. Not targeting your CVto the position
8. Not paying attention/ being empathetic in an interview
9. Not being prepared
10. Not coming across well on the telephone interview

No.3. Leaving on a bad note; why you should never be tempted to have the last word!

Oliver

Is it possible to get a job in 7 days? Day 1 and 2 – “Project Easy Money”

So the challenge to find a job in a week has been set. Lets see what Jim did with his time on Day 1 and 2...

Reality sank in. It was the morning after the night before. The bet had been made, rules agreed and the challenge was on. On the back of a napkin I find a small contract dictating the rules, and the signatures of all those present the evening before who had placed the bet. There was no way out of it now; this (I was assured) was a legally binding napkin.

Early on a bright and breezy Saturday morning Jim was already on the case – and he was in a jovial mood. The phone rang and woke me up.

“I figure you deserve an update on 'Project Easy Money'. So far it's not looking good...for you. After a ropey start I have already pulled together a CV and covering letter. Admittedly, my confident /arrogant estimate of 20 minutes for each was shot out of the water but it’s results that count in this competition…”

He had even decided to get a jump on the plan for Sunday by doing a little reading and research on the sector, opportunities and openings.

It all seemed too good to be true, so I probed a little further as a good HR/ recruitment professional should do. “So, you’ve written your CV in one morning; Is it tailored towards each of the companies / roles you are going to apply to? How long is it? Does it reflect you personality? Have you taken out any jargon?”

“Yes” Jim responded.

A simple and confident answer! I could only assume that he was playing it down a little and had either a) been up all night working on it b) he was nowhere near as prepared as he claimed to be or, most likely c) both.

My confidence about wining our little wager started to wane but received a welcome boost on Sunday when the next update arrived.

Paraphrased a little, Jim told me late on Sunday evening. “What with the 10k in the morning, German F1 at lunch and lazing around in the afternoon, Sunday's work was postponed until late evening. Fortunately a Knocked Up and Austin Powers double bill helped me get some decent computer time in. The first emails went out late this evening.”

Again, as a professional, I was a little concerned. Had he really put enough thought into this? Who and what had he applied for? He wasn’t divulging much information at all.

I was having a morale dilemma now. He is my friend; of course I wanted him to get a job. On the other hand, I was hoping perhaps he made a horrendous mistake in the rush to get his CV out. Perhaps he had accidentally put a link to his Facebook profile which contained a naked picture of himself; maybe he had forgotten to remove the skill stating that he was able to say his ABCs backward in less than five seconds or eat 45 eggs in two minutes (all real examples of CV mistakes I’ve seen!).

It was too late in any case. The wheels were well and truly in motion; he seemed to have made a huge amount of progress since Friday. Dedication can clearly get your along way. Not much I could do now but sit back and wait for the dice to roll.

Would he get any feedback from his applications? Will he be invited to interview? Stay tuned for the next installment...

Is it possible to get a job in a week? A friend of mine thought so!

Is it possible to get a job in a week? A friend of mine thought so. We put him to the test to see if he could go from writing a CV to a signed employment contract in just seven days. Can simply being persistent, bold and active get you through companies' recruitment processes more quickly, or will he get beaten by the system? I had a wager on the system winning – not that I doubted his abilities. We will follow the story over the next few weeks and see what he does and what the secret to job hunting might be.

“A job in week? No problem. This is going to be easy!”. Never one to be short of self-belief, Jim had a few gulps of beer and finished off his crisps. “I’ve been out of work for a while, not because I can't get a job, but because I haven't really tried to get a job”. We laughed and retorted "Pah! £100 quid says you can get a job in 7 days!"

Everyone agreed it was about time Jim got a job, even Jim. So sure of his employability, Jim even let us set criteria for the job. A few moments later, it was agreed. He would apply for a job in the charity sector, working at head office in a full time job, paid at least 20k a year in London's Zone 1 - and he wasn’t allowed to use contacts that he already knew. I should add that he had never worked in the charity sector before. Success would be measured by a signed employment contract by 8pm on the following Friday, back in the same pub.

Now, Jim is a talented and smart chap. It wasn’t that we didn’t think he could get a job. We just didn’t believe that the recruitment systems and processes would enable it to happen that quickly. So, the challenge was on.

Can you get a job in week? From writing the CV, finding the jobs, applying, interviewing and then processing the paperwork? The wager was placed, hands shoook, and Jim armed with a brief plan scribbled on the back of a napkin, grinned and announced “This is going to be easy!”... We all laughed again. ... Easy money, surely?

Watch this space for the first installment of Jim's epic challenge.

1 man; 7 days; 1 job offer; £100s on the table.

Top 10 Job Hunting Mistakes: Not understanding your interviewer

In the first of the series, we explore the importance of judging your interviewers character (though this can be applied to any relationship, both at work and at home) and how that affects the answers that you give.

This post is inspired by a great book by James Borg called ‘The Art of Influencing People’. The book is well worth a read and goes into detail about how to interact with different personalities in many different scenarios to get the best results.

It struck me that exploring and understanding the personality of your interviewer could be key to your success. You spend your whole life (subconsciously) assessing people’s characters, and then changing the way you behave to suit the person and situation. Often however, this goes out of the window as soon as you are in an interview situation. You can get a good idea about the interviewer’s personality and style when they greet you or when walking to the interview room. Being able to work out their personality type will help you respond appropriately and win them over – as personality defines attitudes, perceptions and beliefs.

Although there is a huge amount of research into personalities, in order to keep this advice practical, I will group people into four types from which you decide how to deal with the various types. People can largely be grouped into:

1. Senser
2. Intuiter
3. Thinker
4. Feeler

The first two, Senser and Intuiter, relate to how your interviewer will ‘take in’ information. The Senser will like facts. When taking in information, they tend to be practical, observant and skilful in remembering facts and processing them i.e. they are methodical. The Intuiter pays attention to the vision of what could be. They rely on imagination and are constantly on the lookout for new ideas and stimulating projects. They like new and different experiences.

The second two, Thinker and Feeler, relate to how your interviewer will make decisions. The Thinker relies on intellectual processes to make decisions – based on logic. They will decide impersonally. They might be oblivious to the feelings of other people. For a Feeler, logic may not play a significant part and instead they will rely on emotion. Decisions will be made on personal values and what pleases them - they tend to show a lot of empathy.

Your interviewer is likely to be a combination of the Senser / Intuiter and Thinker / Feeler. The way you should communicate with them should change depending on these combinations.

If they are a Senser – Thinker they will want facts, stability and will make practical decisions:

• Tell them what can be achieved in the short term
• Use facts/ data if you have it
• Conduct yourself in a detached, business like manner
• Don’t waffle in your answers – be concise

If they are a Senser – Feeler they will want verifiable facts, believes in loyalty and trust and being friendly and helpful:

• Use all your natural empathy and conduct things on a personal basis where appropriate (i.e. talking about personal life etc)
• Try and find a shared interest
• Listen intently to what they say and do not interrupt
• Answer questions in a methodical manner

If they are an Intuiter- Feeler they will decide if they like you based on weighing up personal values. They are enthusiastic and value personal relationships, teamwork, cooperation and new ideas:

• Ask a lot of questions and listen carefully
• Show your natural friendliness
• Don’t inundate this person with detail
• Highlight the things that will be new/ may change if you were to work there

If they are an Intuiter – Thinker they will make decisions based on impersonal analysis. They like to analyse and look for logic. They look at the big picture and focus on the long term:

• Concentrate on business and leave ‘personal’ conversation (if there is any) till the end
• Let them have their own time to speak
• Accept that this person may bombard you with criticism. They are just trying to judge your competence. Don’t take it personally
• Be logical and emphasis cause and effect what you have achieved in the past
• Be punctual and well organised

If you use the above as a guide and tailor your answers based on their character you will go a long way to winning the person over. After all, that’s what you (subconsciously) do every day of your life.

Remember however, you still need to be yourself. You have to fit the style of the company too. Don’t simply act as you think they want you to – you are the one who is going to have to work there. Make sure you are a good fit to the company as well.

Good luck!

P.S. Watch out for the next post in the series Top 10 Job Hunting Mistakes to avoid... 'No.2 Not keeping track of your accomplishments.'

The Top 10 Job Hunting Mistakes to Avoid...

There are many factors that affect you getting the job that you want (or you think you deserve). Some of these factors are totally out of your control; economic factors, decision making process, timing. It’s really not worth worrying about these things too much, so don’t. Rather, concentrate on getting the things that are in your control perfected. Below you will find a list of the most common mistakes from our experience (some obvious, some not so obvious) that people make which sabotage their job hunting success.

Over the coming weeks we will expand on each of the points below. The aim is not to tell you what you are doing wrong – but to provide you with practical advice, looking into factors such as; the characteristics of different interviewers and how to behave with them; the importance of expressions and language in telephone interviews; using the right body language and how to make networking work for you.

1.Not understanding the character of your interviewer
2.Not keeping track of your accomplishments
3.Leaving on a bad note
4.Not networking
5.Only using the Internet for research
6.Writing a generic cover letter
7.Not targeting your résumé to the position
8.Not paying attention/ being empathetic in an interview
9.Not being prepared
10.Not coming across well on the telephone interview

Over the next few blog posts we will go into detail on these points helping you to boost your job hunting success.

Read No.1 Not understanding the character of your interviewer now

Watch the movie - How TheCareerMole.com Works

Check out our new movie - How TheCareerMole.com works for a cool animated take on what we do.

Hope you find it useful.

Ollie

What Makes a Good Boss?

I have had some pretty bad managers in my time and so was interested to read this article on what makes a good manager. The points of view come mostly from HR professionals, so it would be interesting to hear the views from people on the ground as to what you think makes a good manager. Does your manager have to tell good jokes? Perhaps take you out to celebrate successes? Everyone is different so let us know your thoughts.

Work parties - what happens when people don't follow the rules?

The Times Online today has an article about what not to do at work parties if you don't want to sabotage your career: Dont have bad breath, dont get drunk, pace yourself and dont embarrass yourself on the dancefloor. Not exactly rocket science. I am a firm believer in learning from other people's mistakes.

So, what is the worst thing to have happened at your work parties? Add your comments but please be kind and remove real names.

How many of these stats do you know?

I found this video on Alex Hen's excellent Digital Recruiting blog. Check it out - some great facts and stats about Gen Y and the world we live and work in.

Office Jargon

Even when you do find that perfect job, there is always one thing that everyone complains about at some point in their career - office jargon. Some of it is so obscure its not clear where it comes from, and in many cases, what it actually means. This article on the BBC describes people's most hated jargon.

Management speak - don't you just hate it? Emphatically yes, judging by readers' responses to writer Lucy Kellaway's campaign against office jargon (see link). Here, we list 50 of the best, worst examples.

1. "When I worked for Verizon, I found the phrase going forward to be more sinister than annoying. When used by my boss - sorry, "team leader" - it was understood to mean that the topic of conversation was at an end and not be discussed again."
Nima Nassefat, Vancouver, Canada

2. "My employers (top half of FTSE 100) recently informed staff that we are no longer allowed to use the phrase brain storm because it might have negative connotations associated with fits. We must now take idea showers. I think that says it all really."
Anonymous, England

3. At my old company (a US multinational), anyone involved with a particular product was encouraged to be a product evangelist. And software users these days, so we hear, want to be platform atheists so that their computers will run programs from any manufacturer."
Philip Lattimore, Thailand

4. "Incentivise is the one that does it for me."
Karl Thomas, Perth, Scotland

5. "My favourite which I hear from the managers at the bank I work for is let's touch base about that offline. I think it means have a private chat but I am still not sure."
Gemma, Wolverhampton, England

6. "Have you ever heard the term loop back which means go back to an associate and deal with them?"
Scott Reed, Lakeland, Florida, US

7-8. "We used to collect the jargon used in a list and award the person with the most at the end of the year. The winner was a client manager with the classic you can't turn a tanker around with a speed boat change. What? Second was we need a holistic, cradle-to-grave approach, whatever that is."
Turner, Manchester

9. "Until recently I had to suffer working for a manager who used phrases such as the idiotic I've got you in my radar in her speech, letters and e-mails. Once, when I mentioned problems with the phone system, she screamed 'NO! You don't have problems, you have challenges'. At which point I almost lost the will to live."
Stephen Gradwick, Liverpool

10. "You can add challenge to the list. Problems are no longer considered problems, they have morphed into challenges."
Irene MacIntyre, Courtenay, B

11. "Business speak even supersedes itself and does so with silliness, the shorthand for quick win is now low hanging fruit."
Paul, Formby, UK

12. "And looking under the bonnet."
Eve Russell, Edinburgh

13-14. "The business-speak that I abhor is pre-prepare and forward planning. Is there any other kind of preparedness or planning?"
Edward Creswick, Exeter

15-16. "The one that really gets me is pre-plan - there is no such thing. Either you plan or you don't. The new one which has got my goat is conversate, widely used to describe a conversation. I just wish people could learn to 'think outside the box' although when they put us in cubes what do they expect?"
Malcolm, Houston

17. "I work in one of those humble call centres for a bank. Apparently, what we're doing at the moment is sprinkling our magic along the way. It's a call centre, not Hogwarts."
Caroline Garlick, Ayrshire

18. "A pet hate is the utterly pointless expression in this space. So instead of the perfectly adequate 'how can I help?' it's 'how can I help in this space?' Or the classic I heard on Friday, 'How can we help our customers in this space going forward?' I think I may have caught this expression at source, as I've yet to hear it said outside my own working environment. So I'm on a personal crusade to stamp it out before it starts infecting other City institutions. Wish me luck in this space."
Colin, London

19. "The one phrase that inspires a rage in me is from the get-go."
Andy, Herts

20. "'Going forward' is only half the phrase that gets up my nose - all politicians seem to use the phrase go forward together. 'We must... we shall... let us now... go forward together'. It gives me a terrible mental image of the whole country linking arms and goose-stepping in unison, with the politicians out in front doing a straight-armed salute. Is it just me?"
Frances Smith, Toronto, Canada

21. "I am a financial journalist and am on a mission to remove words and phrases such as 360-degree thinking from existence."
Richard, London

22. "The latest that's stuck in my head is we are still optimistic things will feed through the sales and delivery pipeline (ie: we actually haven't sold anything to anyone yet but maybe we will one day)."
Alexander, Southampton

23. "I worked in PR for many years and often heard the most ludicrous phrases uttered by CEOs and marketing managers. One of the best was, we'd better not let the grass grow too long on this one. To this day it still echoes in my ears and I giggle to myself whenever I think about it. I can't help but think insecure business people use such phrases to cover up their inability for proper articulation."
Leon Reilly, Ealing, London

24. "Need to get all my ducks in a row now - before the five-year-olds wake up."
Mark Dixon, Bridgend

25. "Australians have started to use auspice as a verb. Instead of saying, 'under the auspices of...', some people now say things like, it was auspiced by..."
Martin Pooley, Marrickville, Australia

26. "My favourite: we've got our fingers down the throat of the organisation of that nodule. Translation = Er, no, WE sorted out the problems to cover your backside."
Theo de Bray, Kettering, UK

27. "The health service in Wales is filled with managers who use this type of language as a substitute for original thought. At meetings we play health-speak bingo; counting the key words lightens the tedium of meetings - including, most recently, my door is open on this issue. What does that mean?"
Edwin Pottle, Llandudno

28-29. "The business phrase I find most irritating is close of play, which is only slightly worse than actioning something."
Ellie, London

30. "Here in the US we have the cringe-worthy and also in addition. Then there's the ever-eloquent 'where are we at?' So far, I haven't noticed the UK's at the end of the day prefacing much over here; thank heavens for small mercies."
Eithne B, Chicago, US

31. "The expression that drives me nuts is 110%, usually said to express passion/commitment/support by people who are not very good at maths. This has created something of a cliche-inflation, where people are now saying 120%, 200%, or if you are really REALLY committed, 500%. I remember once the then-chancellor Gordon Brown saying he was 101% behind Tony Blair, to which people reacted 'What? Only 101?'"
Ricardo Molina, London, UK

32. "My least favourite business-speak term is not enough bandwidth. When an employee used this term to refuse an additional assignment, I realised I was completely 'out of the loop'."
April, Berkeley, US

33. "I once had a boss who said, 'You can't have your cake and eat it, so you have to step up to the plate and face the music.' It was in that moment I knew I had to resign before somebody got badly hurt by a pencil."
Tim, Durban

34. "Capture your colleagues - make sure everyone attends that risk management workshop (compulsory common sense training for idiots)."
Anglowelsh, UK

35-37. "We too used to have daily paradigm shifts, now we have stakeholders who must come to the party or be left out, or whatever."
Barry Hicks, Cape Town, RSA

38. "I have taken to playing buzzword bingo when in meetings. It certainly makes it more entertaining when I am feeding it back (or should that be cascading) at work."
Ian Everett, Bolton

39. "In my work environment it's all cascading at the moment. What they really mean is to communicate or disseminate information, usually downwards. What they don't seem to appreciate is that it sounds like we're being wee'd on. Which we usually are."
LMD, London

40. "At a large media company where I once worked, the head of human resources - itself a weaselly neologism for personnel - told us that she would be cascading down new information to staff. What she meant was she was going to send them a memo. It was one of the reasons I resigned - that, and the fact that the chief exec persisted on referring to the company as a really cool train set."
Andrew, London

41. "Working for an American corporation, this year's favourite word seems to be granularity, meaning detail. As in 'down to that level of granularity'."
Chris Daniel, Anaco, Venezuela

42. "On the wall of our office we have a large signed certificate, signed by all the senior management team, in which they solemnly promise to leverage their talents, display and inspire 'unyielding integrity', and lots of other pretentious buzz-phrases like that. Clueless, the lot of them."
Chris K, Cheltenham UK

43. "After a reduction in workforce, my university department sent this notice out to confused campus customers: 'Thank you for your note. We are assessing and mitigating immediate impacts, and developing a high-level overview to help frame the conversation with our customers and key stakeholders. We intend to start that process within the week. In the meantime, please continue to raise specific concerns or questions about projects with my office via the Transition Support Center..."
Charles R, Seattle, Washington, US

44. "I was told I'd be living the values from now on by my employers at a conference the other week. Here's some modern language for them - meh. A shame as I strongly believe in much of what my employers aim to do. I refuse to adopt the voluntary sectors' client title of 'service user'. How is someone who won't so much as open the door to me using my service? Another case of using four syllables where one would do."
Upscaled Blue-Sky thinker, Cardiff

45. "Business talk 2.0 is maddening, meaningless, patronising and I despise it."
Doug, London

46. "Lately I've come across the strategic staircase. What on earth is this? I'll tell you; it's office speak for a bit of a plan for the future. It's not moving on but moving up. How strategic can a staircase really be? A lot I suppose, if you want to get to the top without climbing over all your colleagues."
Peter Walters, Cheadle Hulme, UK

47. "When a stock market is down why must we be told it is in negative territory?"
Phil Linehan, Mexico City, Mexico

48. "The particular phrase I love to hate is drill down, which handily can be used either as an adverb/verb combo or as a compound noun, ie: 'the next level drill-down', sometimes even in the same sentence - a nice bit of multi-tasking."
B, London

49. "Thanks for the impactful article; I especially appreciated the level of granularity. A high altitude view often misses the siloed thinking typical of most businesses. Absent any scheme for incentivitising clear speech, however, I'm afraid we're stuck with biz-speak."
Timothy Denton, New York

50. "It wouldn't do the pinstripers any harm to crack a smile and say what they really felt once in a while instead of trotting out such clinical platitudes. Of course a group of them may need to workshop it first: Wouldn't want to wrongside the demographic."
Trick Cyclist, Tripoli, Libya